


Disenchanted Heart

by wordsofaninsanemind



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Frerard, Loss, Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-30
Updated: 2014-04-30
Packaged: 2018-01-21 10:03:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 403
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1546799
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wordsofaninsanemind/pseuds/wordsofaninsanemind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gerard at the beach thinking about Frank and losing him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Disenchanted Heart

I look out over the ocean, my feet in the sand and my thoughts linger around **you**. 

_I'm not really sure where it all went wrong._

You were my _light_ in the **darkness**. 

My _spark_ of **sanity**. 

My _smile_ amidst all of the **frowns**. 

You were the _light_ that guided me through all my **rights and wrongs**. 

Even as the years have gone by, I am still just as confused.

_My heart hurts._

Maybe you blamed me when it was all over. 

Maybe you thought _I didn't love you_ enough, that I chose her over you. 

**And maybe I did.**

We use to be so close. 

You were once _my best friend_ and now you are a **distant memory**.

Maybe we did just grow apart. I mean we were basically kids when the band started. 

Each one of us with our own personality. 

Each one of us so different that it brought such chemistry into the band and made it work. I mean, if today we tried to start the band like we did at the beginning then it wouldn't work, we are all too different now.

What you didn't understand was that I saw you with her and it made me **jealous**. 

It wasn't that I thought you loved her more, it was the thought that she could _give you things that I never could_.

I am not against two men or two woman being together, I just think that everything has a purpose or a reason and as much as _I loved you_...I don't think **your purpose was to be with me**.

I think I held you back. 

You were this ball of energy that no one could control. 

_This whisper in the wind that longed to be loud and heard._

Look at what an amazing father you are and I could only hope to be half of that with my daughter.

Stupid tears.

**I miss you** , you know.

_Everyday._

**My heart secretly aching for you** while my brain tries to deny it.

I sit in my office day after day, trying to do things that distract me and it never goes away.

_Something always reminds me of **you**_.

**I am always going to love you.**

You will always be my first true love. 

_You will always be in my heart._

**You will always burn so bright.**

_Frank..._

Even the stars hold no answers for me. 

I wish you knew... 


End file.
